Why is it that those two words sum up an entire conversation, and answer every question you've ever had. "What is the meaning of life?" Your mom.
And it's partly true.Me and my roommate were wondering where all the good men in the world have gone? We were thinking...wouldn't it be great if there was one place they would all meet and hang out. Then we realized...there is. It's called home to their wives. Wasn't there a song about where the good men have gone...like, they've become soldiers, every one. Hmmm. I should have joined the Army. So, I took a quiz yesterday and realized I am an Anus Cloud. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you have never heard of the rejected cartoons. Search for them on Google and get back to me when you are in the know. And once you see it, you will say to yourself. FuckingAright. She is, in fact, the anus cloud. The similarities are amazing.
I am going to see Dane Cook next Friday. LIVE BITCHES!A gift from someone who so obviously loves the fuck out of me. I will say Hi to Dane for everyone. I'm going to sport the Hawk. I shall get noticed! I should have a shirt made that says..."Fuck Shoes." Or maybe, "I bleed if you shoot me in the chest plate." If you don't get that joke, then you have not read my profile, and you don't even know me. There are movies out. I want to see them. That's all I have to say about that.
My friend Diane is going to get her first tattoo on Sunday. I cannot wait. She's going to get it on her back. The artist said that she can lay on her tummy and relax. He told her she may even fall asleep. I said, yes, it's very comfortable and peaceful, when you lay there while a needle scrapes across your skin and you listen to what sounds like a weedwacker for an hour. Thinking about it makes me want to sink into dream world. I have a tattoo I'm going to get covered. If you want to know what it is currently you will have to go out and rent Madonna's Truth or Dare video. Look at the back cover. And only then will you know. You can go ahead and ask if you want...you'll get the universal reply to every question...Your Mom
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