A few of my favorite things, and some things I hate

(Original Post: September 23, 2006 - Saturday)

I woke up this morning and thought I was late for work. I hate when that happens. However, I love the moment you realize it's a weekend.I hate when you come home and your roommate gets mad at you because you are using her meat scissors to open a package. To my defense, I didn't at the time know what meat scissors were exactly. I thought it was just a cutting device stationed in the kitchen for convenience. However, once I realized they really are for cutting meat, I said I was sorry. And now I only use them to cut paper...not boxes. And why are they called scissors. Is there two of them? Is each blade a scissor. If I broke half of the device, would I then say, hey, pass me the scissor? I love when it's hot out because I get to wear sandals, but I'm always complaining about the heat. Until it gets cold, then I'm pissed because sweaters make me look fat.I hate that last night the neon sign at Taco Bell said 'Drive Thru Open' but when I went through it was closed. I hate when loved ones get mad at me for testing their loyalty. If I don't test, how do I know? How come students don't get mad when you test them? What if they said, "Hey, why do you continue to quiz and test? Don't you trust that I know the information? I can't believe you don't believe in me. We're over."Paris Hilton tests her friends. She picks out two dresses. One that looks horrible on her and one that looks amazing. She asks the girl which one she should wear. If the girl picks the ugly one, Paris ends the friendship.I should start doing that. Like, Hey, should I order the plain chicken with a side salad or should I get the cheesy chili curly fries with onions and bacon covered in ranch? If they give me the hundred pound answer, I eat it, and then cut them out of my life forever. Even Adam and Eve were tested. Maybe Adam should have said, God, bro, check it out. I'm gonna mess it all up down here. So stop testing me. Because you'll continue to disappoint yourself. And I like you too much to let you do that. Don't you hate those moments in a relationship where your other half gets up to use the restroom and you have a decision to make...check the phone or not. I love when you can make the decision not to check. I hate when you decide to check and the first message you see says, 'In the Ass?'That's never a good sign.