Currently Chasing: A Song I Know

Last night my friend and I went to an Incubus concert. Now, don’t hate me, but just hearing the name Incubus doesn’t get me into a stir or cause heart palpitations. In fact, when she first invited me, and all the way into dinner that evening, I could not have actually sung a single note from a single song. However, she asked me to go. And I’m a yes girl.
She went to ‘fuck me big time.com’ also known as stub hub and paid $300 for tickets in Row H, slightly to the right of center. When she got the tickets in the mail, the price per ticket was a mere $45. She didn’t care though. The point was she had great seats for a great concert.
As we pull into the parking lot she said, “these tickets come with free parking.” It’s Merriweather in Columbia. All tickets come with free parking.
So we get into the venue and head straight to the concession stand. She wants a T-shirt. I tell her I’ll buy her one since she paid for the tickets to the concert. But the flimsy, see through, barely held together T-shirts were a convenient $45 bucks a pop. I looked at her and said, you’re on your own if you want this rip-off on a stick. She still did. And she bought me one. My girl! We changed in the Nasty disease infested port-a-potties, and we were finally on our way to the not-so-cheap seats.
When we got there I noticed right away that the guy on my left was ridiculously attractive. I asked him if he wanted to sit next to the cute one, and motioned toward my sugar momma. He said, “I already am.” POINTS FOR MR. CASANOVA!
I also notice right away that the guy to the right of us has most likely never slept with a woman. And he never will.
I find out pretty early on that Mr. Casanova is somewhere around 21 years old, but possibly as young as 19. And he’s single. I also find out early on that they guy to our right stinks, and is also – SURPRISE – single.
Incubus finally starts playing. The lead singer is dressed in skinny black jeans and a blue and white, horizontal-striped T-shirt. Very odd. It’s a V neck. It’s big. Too big for those skinny jeans. He keeps pulling on his hair and acting like he doesn’t know where he is. Part of the tortured rock star persona I’m sure. I can’t make out a single word to any of the first five songs. No one will sit the fuck down, so I’m forced to stand if I want to see. So much for the expensive seating. Also, the people behind me keep tapping on my shoulder and asking for a hug. Then I smell Weed, and the whole hugging things makes a little more sense. But is still fucking annoying.
Toward the end of the concert, couples are just making out everywhere. There is literally the beginnings of a porn happening at the end of our row. I don’t want to look. But I do. But I don’t. But I do. But. I. Do.
I recognized a few chorus notes here and there, but no real connection with any of the songs. Until the very last one. The lead singer started it out…”Dearly Beloved. We are gathered here today.” The crowd went crazy. The young guy next to us says, oh my GOD, Let’s get crazy is my favorite Incubus song! He’s 19 for sure. And all the looks in the world won’t make up for Prince Ignorance.
Positive point of the night. That shirt made my tits look huge!