Currently Chasing: Coincidence

Have you ever met a person in such extremely strange circumstances, that you just feel like no matter what happens, you are drawn to them? Yeah, me neither. But let me tell you this story anyway.

One night about three or four years ago I went out to what used to be called Bar Baltimore. It was a group of us girls. We were showing up early for a huge adult-toy party (adult barbies and adult speak and spells…that kind of thing. Or fake dicks.) I was there with a few of my besties. We had also invited my ex husbands ex wife and his (at the time) fiancé. What could go wrong?

So toward the middle of the night I’m feeling like crap. My ex husbands ex wife was already remarried and anxious to get back to her hubby. My ex husbands current fiancé was eager to get back to my ex husband as well. So there it is, in all its glory, alcohol and loneliness.

Just then a friend walks up and introduces me to her friend. I’m attracted to him right away. But let’s face it, I would have been attracted to just about anything in that moment. In fact, I had been chatting up a fake dick for an hour. So anyway, we end up dancing and talking the rest of the night and within a week, he’s my man.

Now in typical relationship fashion, we begin telling each other all about our ex’s. Turns out he has one douche bag of an ex girlfriend, who just happens to live one street over from me at the time. He said she was dating another guy, but started cheating on that guy with him. Then later in their relationship she started cheated on him with that same other guy. Classic case of ‘have cake, eat cake.’ We’ve all been there. I ask how he found out and he says that she left her email open and saw about 150 emails back and forth and called her on it. And that was the end of it.

So after four or five months he and I ended our love affair. Turns out he was getting kicked out of the Marine Corps and there was some shadiness surrounding why he was getting kicked out and my friends advised me to just cut ties and not get involved. So I did.

A few months later one of my best friends starts long-distance dating a guy on a ship in Virginia. She’s happy as hell with her new pen pal. I tell her to tell her ‘man’ to find me a pen pal on the ship. He says he knows just the person. A few days later I get an email and a photo. A nice looking, tall and SINGLE guy. Wow, I thought they were myths.

We start emailing back and forth and agree to meet up once he pulls back in port. So a week after he pulls in, I’m heading down to Virginia. On my way he calls to talk me through the road trip. And we start talking about, what else…Ex’s.

He tells me this story about this girl he was dating. She started cheating on him with some guy and then ended up cheating on that guy with him. She couldn’t make up her mind. Classic case of ‘have cake, eat cake.’ I tell him that my ex was a great guy, and that he had a similar story to that. I also mention that we broke up because of his shady release from the Marines. We keep talking…him about her, and me about him.

“What is your ex boyfriend’s name?” He asks.

“Why, he lives in Maryland, it’s not like you know him,” I respond.

“Just for shits and giggles,” he replies back.

So I tell him...and there is dead silence before I hear.

“OH MY GOD, That is the same FUCKING guy!”

“No way,” I say.

“I don’t know what’s worse, going before him, or going after him,” he snaps back.

“Should I just turn around?” I ask.

“No, but you have to admit it’s weird.”

Yeah…I’ll admit it. And it was weirder the first time he drove to my house and had to drive past hers to get there.

One day one of his friends said, isn’t it weird that this other girl keeps popping up in your life…maybe she’s your soul mate.

I beg to differ. It’s my life this bitch keeps popping up in. I feel like I should actually know this heart breaker. Cause I’ve been cleaning up her messes for years.