Currently Chasing: Youth (or wait, nevermind)

Oh yes, it is that time. Monday is my Birthday. 35 years. Holy Moly man, are you serious? And there are all these things around me. Like the new Footloose movie. And the not so new Karate Kid movie. And my daughter still isn’t totally sure who Madonna is, even though Madonna was Lady GaGa even before Lady Ga Ga knew she was a lady!

And I went to a New Kids on the Block concert a couple of months ago and they were more like Old Spices on the Rack. And there are new wrinkles, and more creases, and phones talk to you.

And Kelly Clarkson won American Idol 10 years ago!

I’m reflecting. And sometimes that is scary…and I started to freak out..but then I remembered some things.

1.        I can drive (Kind of)

2.       I can pay my own bills (Kind of)

3.       I can vote (Although I never have)

4.       I am no longer judged for what I wear or what shoes I have on (that’s a lie)

5.       I am a mother (I use that term loosely)

6.       I no longer struggle with my weight and have accepted my body (haha! What a crock of shit)

7.       I own my home (the bank owns it and I pay mortgage, which is a fancy way of saying rent)

8.       I am perfectly fine being alone (as long as someone is with me)

9.       I have savings (thank god I’m not allowed to touch it without severe tax implications)

10.   My glass is always half full (except when it’s totally empty)

After looking at that list, it turns out I’m not so old after all. Still so immature, still flirty with teenage waiters, still text-fighting, still sexting, still a huge gossip, still using the empty-threat method to get my daughter to do what she’s supposed to do, still bribing her with staying up late if she’ll rub my feet, still buying things I don’t need and can’t afford and still making terrible decisions that could ruin the next 35 years of my life.

THANK GOD.  The year is the only thing that changes.

I’ve heard my friends try on clothes and say – “I haven’t fit in to this since high school!”

If I fit in to something I wore in high school, please shoot me! Because this is what I looked like in high school:



Are you fucking kidding me with this starter jacket? Did I know nothing about slimming effects back then? Still can't find me? I'm the one on the left. How could you possibly fucking miss me!



And this is me now:

With less friends, but I've finally got the hang of camera angles!

I went home on leave recently and visited my high school friends. We've all changed so much, but not at all. Yeah, maybe my daughter will never know what a pager is...maybe the only destiny's child she'll hear about is the one growing in Beyonce's tummy, and maybe she'll never know Kevin Bacon as the original bad boy of dance ... but I'm thankful for the years and I like how they've treated me.

At this point I do not feel in danger of growing up. And that's when you know you're a grown up.