Currently Chasing: My Identity

My identity has been stolen twice this month. Not only am I spending money I don't have, but other people are wanting to spend money I don't have. Luckily, and not quite sure how, but both banks caught it and cancelled my cards. Pretty incredible. But how did they know? I mean, I was spending hundreds of dollars on bullshit that was both ridiculous and unnecessary, so how did they decide that the last few charges of ridiculous and unnecessary weren't indeed mine? Was someone in the back room watching the charges come through and thinking to themselves ... Plastic surgery? Yep, that's her. Olive Garden? Definitely. 300 in bath and body products? Of course. Random bullshit she can't afford? uh huh. Other random bullshit she can't afford. FUCK NO THAT'S NOT HER! CANCEL THAT CARD!

Whatever the case, I'm thankful. Back in the day people were just fucked. That money was just gone and you were stuck paying thousands of dollars for stuff you'll never see, instead of just paying thousands of dollars for stuff that you can't remember seeing. Now identity theft is so common that they have learned to spot it immediately...that is both sad and such a relief all at the same time.

Now I'm going to start doing something I haven't done in ages. Something completely out of character for me. Something I'm not even sure I know how to manage anymore. I'm going to start paying for things in cash! At least then if someone robs me of it, I know it. It's a physical thing and not a virtual thing. Although physical things, though you can see them and you know they are happening, can sometimes end with you losing your life and never know what's happening ever again. So that's not good.

Damn it...whoever said money is the root of all evil was so fucking right. Everything always comes back to money. How much you have. How much you don't have. and how much you want what others have. What if we just went back to simple trading. But what would I trade if not money? I don't cook? I burned a ton of rice crispy treats over the holiday break. I don't sew or do anything like useful like that. I could give out short stories? I could be a jester? I could entertain. Oh good lord, I don't like the road this is going down. Seems the road wouldn't be the only thing having to go down if we resorted to this bartering system again. So cash it is. Honest work and cash.

I'm protecting my identity here people. Although, these days, I'm not even really sure who I am anymore.