My Greeal? Are you for real?

(Original Post: February 2, 2006 - Thursday)

I'm listening to a new song by Nelly. It says, smile for me daddy, I want to see your greeal. Not Grill. It's not pronounced like that. In true Nelly fashion he has taken a word we would normally pronounce correctly and fucked it all up. And if that wasn't bad enough he has made a whole song about looking at someone's teeth. And in the video, by the way, he has a whole mouth full of 'bling' if you will.
Now don't get me wrong. I'm a big fan of great teeth. Like Dane said, nothing is more of a turn off than bad teeth. If I snag my Christmas sweater on your corn tooth, we indeed have a problem. But trust me, the less gold, white gold, platinum, sterling silver or black hills gold you have in your hole, the better. I do not want your mouth to be worth more than my house.
And now I'm listening to Ashley talking about L-O, L-O, L-O, L-O-V-E. That's what she's talkin' bout. Jeezus. She's at a house party. Everyone is drunk and jumping on the bed. She's dancing with a cane. She is also spinning her head around like a price is right wheel. These are classic signs of true love. And just so you know, you will for sure find love at a house party full of people you already fucking know and have probably already slept with. So yeah, good luck with that.
Trust me. I have been to Baja's on quarter beer night. Love does not live there. Then again, love doesn't live where I work either. And it doesn't live next door to me. It isn't at any eating establishment I've ever been to and it does not live in this computer. So where do you meet those people you love?
It seems like the only person I truly love without condition in this life is My daughter. And that's pretty much a given anyway because you've really gotta be in love with someone to let their entire body pass through your vagina. Especially the shoulder. That shoulder part is a bitch.
Thanks Nelly, for inspiring a birth blog. Nice.