You want me to use a paddle?

(Original Post: November 15, 2006 - Wednesday)

The other day my daughter stuck her tongue out. She pushed it way out there and the teacher was pissed. Then she did it again. She was told to stop, yet, for good measure, she stuck it out there one more time. Well, that was that. The teacher pulled her into the office and had a talk with her. They told her to go into 'timeout.' She refused. They told her to sit down and be still, she refused. They called her father. He read her the riot act. She promised to oblige. But didn't.So they called me. I mean really? What am I going to do? Get on the phone with her and in my meanest voice tell her to knock it off? Well, actually the school had something different in mind. They asked me to make my way to the building. This was a serious infraction and she needed to be 'punished.'So off I go. When I get there she is in the office. The principal talks to me about her behavior. About how they will not tolerate a child disobeying. About how awful it is to stick your tongue out. He suggests to me that I punish my daughter in private, and then send her out to apologize to the teacher. Then he does something I still cannot believe. He says, "Here is what we recommend." He opens a drawer and pulls out a paddle. He holds it firmly. He then proceeds to bend over a chair. He says, "We have the child bend over a chair, like so. And then we ask the parent to paddle them, three times, hard." Meanwhile he is spanking himself with this paddle, three times, hard. It's disturbing. If you have to go back and reread this paragraph, then do it. I'll wait.So then he hands me the paddle and he walks out. I'm frozen. I look at my daughter. She looks at me. We are in a daze. Finally I say, well, you heard the man...bend over the chair. She gets a horrified look on her face. The problem is, I know when she emerges from this room they fully expect her to be in tears. They want me to paddle her, three times, hard. She bends over the chair and I manage one very weak attempt at a spanking. The second time is a bit harder. She perks up a bit and tells me that it hurt. I don't see the point in doing it a third time. I send her out to say sorry. It is then that he chooses to give us both a lecture on the purposes of a tongue. It is for eating and talking and ... he leaves himself open for a third thing...but think about it. There is really no third thing...but he can't just end the sentence because inflection has ended up and we are not at the natural end of a sentence. So he says, It is for eating and talking and ... other things.OTHER THINGS?! What other things...that's what I want to know. What the heck is he talking about. He feels the vibe is strange, and mumbles something to my little one about growing up and working and how coworkers will not like it if she sticks her tongue out. I'm just trying to get the F out of there. A few days later a note was sent home with her. It spells out that she has thrown a temper tantrum twice and if it happens a third time they will call me to come in and paddle her. There it was again, in black and white. Paddle. Did I mention this is a private Christian school?Now, whenever I ask how her day was she says, 'I didn't Sin, so that's good, right mommy?"I wonder what age she will be when she seeks out her first therapist.